My ex sent me a very, very, very long email today. He said I led him on, I should never have said I loved him, I shouldn't have been as affectionate as I was with him, or told him I was sad on nights he couldn't come over. He said he feels "played." He says (for the hundredth time!) that he wants to be friends with benefits, I should never be jealous that he's f*cking other girls.
It was kind of an aggressive email. I guess he's feeling mad again. His emotional state seems to change from email to email.
I will say, given how much he wants to have sex with me again, it's a wonder I EVER felt unsure about his sexual attraction to me. The guy mentions being friends with benefits in EVERY email he sends me. I'm hugely flattered, I must say. I'm becoming skeptical that it will happen though. By the time he is in a place where he can sleep with me without heartache, it's possible I'll be with someone. I think we're looking at many months before friends with benefits is a possible situation.
Other news: My roommate SNAPPED at me two nights ago. It was totally undeserved, and it has strained the relationship. I can only guess that she's feeling stressed about her final exams, but she has 2, spread out. I have 5...in a row. Cry me a river.
I think I'm going to let this recent aggressive outburst go as her First Mulligan, but if it happens again, I'm liable to fly off the handle and rip into her. It was totally inappropriate. And for goshsakes, I'm going through a break up and dealing with exams myself. I'm stressed out too. Mean Namechange thinks to herself, "If her personality is THIS volatile and bitchy (and I've seen it before, in more muted forms), NO WONDER she's been single so long. I wouldn't date someone so emotionally unstable."
Hopefully we come to some sort of peace about this. We leave for Cuba together in 2 weeks. I'm not that worried about it being awkward, but I'm the type of personality that if you're being intolerable company, even if I'm in Cuba, I'll tell you to go to hell and go enjoy my own company.
I can feel in my own writing that exam stress is getting to me, too. sigh. :-(
