My boyfriend is upset. I have been feeling stressed and unhappy for the past few hours because of work. I am in this new job and it's going well. I like it, and I'm optimistic about it, but i'm still new and I've only had BAD (very BAD) experiences with restaurant management. I think in the back of my mind, I'm just waiting to get in shit for something or start hating my managers. It's just because of previous experience and i really do think my managers at this place are normal, decent people.
having said that, i was feeling stressed and unhappy this afternoon. my boyfriend took the day off work and was sitting around. i came into my room and was like, "I think your calmness exacerbates my stressed state". I didn't intend to be mean, but it was a truthful statement. He immediately said that he would get going because his presence was stressing me out which I think was intended to make me feel badly. I feel badly that his feelings weere hurt, but to be honest, the SECOND he left the house, I relaxed. It's like, I have a few minutes before work to clear my head, check my appearance, do ridiculous little hair checks that he thinks make no difference, type an entry on D-land... and just generally have a moment of space. He was trying to be supportive by walking me to work, but he just doesn't know the right things to say when I'm stressed.
Anyway, I have to go to work in a few minutes and actually, I'm feeling ok about it.
I had a dream last night that my boyfriend didn't like the designer wallet i bought him for his birthday. i don't know what the dream means, if anything.
i feel badly that i hurt his feelings, but honestly, i'm really glad he left. i didn't realize how much more relaxed i'd feel with him gone.
