I just went shopping with my best girlfriend. We have a lot of fun together, and we communicate often by phone. She's really one of my closest friends. But g-d, do I ever feel CHEAP-looking when I stand next to her! We often go shopping, and she is truly one of the best dressed people on the street. (In Vancouver, which has some very expensively dressed people, to say the least.) I'm not the type of person to try to keep up with the Joneses... I am a full time student, I am not working, I don't have disposable income, and what I do have, I spend on restaurants and movies with my boyfriend. My closet is not regularly revamped.
It's not really a big deal, but honestly, next to her [in an environment that is focussed on attire (shopping)] I look like a cheap Sears catalog. (Or J.C. Penny, if you prefer). I look normal, but next to her, I really (feel like I) look like crap.
It doesn't bother me hugely, I'm not that shallow or envious, but it can make shopping less than inspiring. I don't even go into the stores I usually look in because even bringing her into those stores makes her look expensive. (And it makes me uncomfortable because I know she looks at the merchandise as crappy.)
In fact, if I had to describe this friend's look, that would be it: expensive. She looks expensive.
I'm a pretty girl, I'm not threatened by other pretty girls (honestly), but heads turn with this girl. Every guy who meets her tells me how pretty she is. In fact, every girl who meets her comments on how pretty she is. She's beautiful. Really, really interestingly beautiful.
I think what kind of bothers me about these shopping experiences, (and candidly, that guys tell me how beautiful she is), is that while I realize she has great fashion taste, the fact remains that she can AFFORD to look fabulous. Her father makes a lot of money and still supports her (and she's 27, so she's been supported for a while). I don't want to begrudge her her clothing, or her car, or her makeup, shoes, purses... etc. She's extremely generous and a very good friend to me. But it does kind of irk me when guys tell me how attractive she is because I feel like saying, "yes, she's beautiful, but do you realize her outfit costs more than your rent?" Because that's the thing, they don't realize how much money goes into that appearance. When you have money to buy $90 shirts, and $300-400 jeans, you BET they look good!
A different friend did the same thing to me in the summer when she visited. She became visibly jealous of my clothing and accessories. (I was working at the time so I was able to buy some decent outfits). I remember how that felt and especially, that I viewed that (jealous) friend as a lousy friend for begrudging me my stuff. I'm not so bratty as to feel overtly jealous or bitter toward my girlfriend; she looks good, she can afford to look great, she's a good friend to me, there's no reason for me to feel badly that I can't dress up to par with her. There's no expectation for that. But it can feel kind of shitty for me when she makes judgemental comments about people's clothing, and cheaper stores' displays knowing that a) I may have to shop at those stores because I can't afford more expensive ones, and b) she has nice taste, but recognize that if you can buy high quality, high fashion items, it's much easier to look 'good'.
Sometimes I think she misses that fact. Sometimes I wish she'd be more aware of just how financially privileged she is and that while good taste is one thing, designer clothing does enable you to be less creative (or take "fashion risks") and still look incredible.
